Using a parallel series for more powerful writing

 Whew, the first sentence of this graf in an AP story requires some mental mastication through its 43 words.

Let's dissect how judicious use of parallel elements in series can produce tighter, more powerful writing that most of all is easier on readers.

In the process, true crime enthusiasts, concerned onlookers and many others found the latest subject of their fascination in the yearslong unraveling of a mystery that jurors weighed in a six-week trial that culminated in a deliberation that took less than three hours. Murdaugh, 54, received life in prison at a Friday morning sentencing.

The sentence uses a somewhat parallel structure built around the decreasing time elements, but it's blurred because the time element is obscured or changes form as we go along.

-- yearslong unraveling of a mystery (establishes a form for readers, time-object in a  nice tight phrase)

-- that jurors weighed in a six-week trial (six-week trial keeps the time-object pattern but it's pushed back and obscured by the verbiage in front)

-- that culminated in a deliberation that took less than three hours (reverses the pattern to object-time; might be "less than three hours of deliberation" or "a less than three-hour deliberation,"* but the verbiage still obscures the power of the decreasing time elements).

It might be better formed as a clear series:

In the process, true-crime enthusiasts, concerned onlookers and many others found the latest subject of their fascination in a yearslong unraveling of a mystery, a six-week trial, and less than three hours of jury deliberation. Murdaugh, 54, received life in prison at a Friday morning sentencing.

The very structure itself leads to a culmination, a form of "show," which we know is almost always more powerful that "tell."

That's also 35 words, 20% shorter, 36 if you don't hyphenate "true crime." But I would argue for hyphenation because what's being said is enthuiasts of true crime, not true enthusiasts of crime.

* "A less than three-hour jury deliberation" is a tad shorter, but it does seem a bit forced, and the short-short-longer structure is a long-used one. And the last part allows readers to catch a mental breath before moving on.

The story is at https://apnews.com/article/alex-murdaugh-murder-trial-4f1116609e6c49115f45616121961997